Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
