please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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