I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
