Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
