I cockslap morals
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Randomize
