And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
