EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
ok first of all what the fuck
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
