He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
