Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize