I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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