What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
