Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize
