How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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