OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Randomize
