I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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