SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
