i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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