is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
