is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
