I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
do nipples grow back?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
