just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
