He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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