i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
