I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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