Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
