Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
