He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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