I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
