am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
