..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize