Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
