I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize