She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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