So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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