I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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