dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I FOUND THE LEGS
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
