Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Randomize
