I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
