Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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