The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
