Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
