I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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