saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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