everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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