let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
