Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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