He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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