we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize