so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize