those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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