You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
