His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
